Back to life, Back to Nutella (FOUR)

And with that, my little novel, (ahem, novelette!) is over!

Thank you all so much for the love over the past few days (faith in humanity: restored!) It's hard to be vulnerable and open, but I've been sitting on these posts for a good couple of months, and it felt like the right time to let 'em free! I needed closure, I needed freedom....and to talk about the elephant in the room.

Luckily though, I'm done! We can go back to worrying about the important things in life. I currently have a wildly impressive cold sore which demands a lot of my nervous energy, as well as the looming horrors of history tests and piano recitals. And you? You've probably got a 3 seasons of Downton Abbey to catch up on. I'm sorry for interrupting your marathon!

But, after all, I can't make everyone happy,
I'm not a jar of nutella.

Let that be a life lesson to all of us. And off you go!

REJOICE IN HOPE, 

BE PATIENT IN TRIBULATION, 

AND STEADFAST IN PRAYER.

Romans 12:12

And suddenly, a comma! (THREE)

(exhale friends, the end is near! we can go back to macaroon photos soon!)

Losing a friend is hard. Losing my best friend was really hard.
But in my retelling of the tale, I left out the most important part of the story,

I left out My wonderful, gracious, extraordinary Heavenly Father.

Our friendship may have ended, BUT GOD remained a faithful friend to me. I may have been broken, BUT GOD was my strength. I may have felt helpless and alone, BUT GOD lifted my burdens into His mighty hands. I might have been friendless, BUT GOD filled my cup and then some.

As fate (or God! probably that ) would have it, I have simultaneously been experiencing this same kind of thing, but on the other end. On the end full of grace and goodness. One friendship crashing down, another being built back to glorious heights. He restored a different old, broken friendship. He resurrected it! He made it new! (it's like Easter all over again!)

And because of that, because of HIM, I have hope. Not because the situation looks promising,
But because I know God is in control of the situation. Redemption is inevitable, it's just a question of which side of Heaven it will happen on.

Because I know in the end, He wins.

And that's the best part about it.

Do you know that cute, cliche Christian quote? The one about not placing a period where God has placed a comma? A few weeks ago, I began erasing the self imposed period of this part of my story. I penciled in a comma. A divine, God ordained comma.

Sadness has been replaced with peace. Mourning slowly morphed into Joy. Weeping to (really bad) dancing. A friend lost, a new understanding of the Lord gained. And with it enough peace for a herd of hippies, which is one of the best side effects to date.

And so sorry if I faked you out with the dramatic title of this saga. This isn't really the end of everything.....

Though God's grace, it's the beginning of so much more. 

The Last Good Day (TWO)

"There's no way of knowing that your last good day is Your Last Good Day. At the time, it is just another good day." 
- The Fault in Our Stars

I had a good day with two of my dearest friends a few months ago. And, as life would have it,  I had no idea it would be my Last Good Day, of a different kind.

Imagine being friends with someone for 14 years. Imagine that you tell that person everything, the secrets, the juicy news, the drama. The friend whose door you don't have to knock on, because you know you can come right in. The friend who was more than just a friend, she was your sister.

And then imagine that one day, she won't talk to you.

(plot twist!)

It's been really hard for me, the past few months. Losing my greatest friend, my (I thought) closest ally. I honestly can't even remember NOT being friends with her because we've been friends for so long.

Or I should say, we were friends for so long. Key word being were.

It's not easy to lose someone you thought would be in your life forever. It's not easy to wake up one morning and realize you don't have anyone to talk to about boys or nail polish (both, equally important in life.) And when you're that girl who has had your wedding planned for years...well, now I have to start looking for a new maid of honor.

I keep thinking back to the Last Good Day. And I wish I could have known, how significant that day really was. I try and remember something that went wrong, but it was perfect. In every way...to me at least. We were giggling at inside jokes practically older than us, snapping bestie photos and all that jazz.

But no.

It was the last time we'd ever laugh about that joke, the last time we'd ever take a photo together.

That was the last time she was my best friend.

That was the last time she was my friend at all.

The stupid thing is, I'm not even mad. I'm heartbroken and crushed and in tears some days, but I'm not mad at all. I keep expecting a text from her. I keep thinking I've got to tell her this! I'm still curious how her book is coming and if the characters got married or not and wondering if she still keeps the newspaper clipping of our art teacher in her closet.

And then I realize, I'll never know. 

And that's hard for me.

The End of Everything (ONE)

Last night I had a dream that my best friend attacked me. Both verbally and physically, it was intense. I woke up soaked in sweat....and with the realization that I needed to share what's been brewing.

There are only 3 people in the world who will understand the significance of this photo. 2 of them don't read this blog and the other one is me.

But all the same, I got new tape in art class.

I threw away the old tape, and the memory's of the person who gave it to me. A new friend lent me hers. And it was hard. I was debating whether to do it or not, to move on, to throw it away.

It was stupid, it was silly. But it was the last piece I had of her.

Welcome to The End of Everything.

As instructed by Kathleen Kelly....

Don't you love New York in the Fall? It makes me want to buy school supplies - I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name or address.

Watching You've Got Mail and going to New York City in the same weekend has to be the coincidence of a life time.

I actually wrote a whole post about You've Got Mail because well, You've Got Mail is like a pair of warm socks on a cold day or the first splash in the pool on a hot one. It's refreshing. It's warm. It's perfect.

As we explored around the city, I felt a little bit of Kathleen Kelly. Both in me (on high alert for daisies! the world's friendliest flower!) and around me, like she was watching. And I think it would be a great honor to have Kathleen Kelly watching me explore her most beloved city.

Our day was actually a "disaster" by first world standards. First, we missed our flight. BUT! I ended up going to a new state, so check New Jersey off the list. Then we had to wait 10 extra minutes underground on dirty Ebola encrusted benches because I lost the directions to my subway pass. But I don't have ebola...yet. Then we walked around the city for about 2 hours only to miss the ferry to Lady Liberty.

So! As watched from the promenade as the last ferry left (without us on it, that's the kicker) Kathleen Kelly came in a vision, dancing on the Hudson, and said in a breathy voice  "To Brooklyn."

And so, we went to Brooklyn.

(shoutout to shadow dad and fly catching mouth kryn. But it's Fall and I didn't mind wearing jeans so we gotta celebrate...by throwing baby leaves!)

Thanks New York!
And with that, I hope your mango is ripe.

PS: if you don't get that: go watch You've Got Mail.

FOR THE LOVE OF NEUTRALS

 If you don't follow me on pinterest....you have a life.

Congrats!!

It's no secret that bright colors are the way to my soul. But then! I was looking through my pinterest because what else should one do? And I noticed a whole lot of neutrals.... AND THEN  another day I bought a shirt that wasn't obnoxiously bright or plastered with a hypnotizing print....and it felt like I sold a little piece of my soul.

So here's something you don't often see! Kryn playing around with neutrals. Kryn liking something other than pink.

It's a great day in History!

JUST SOME THINGS TO KEEP A GIRL HAPPY....

JUST A GUESS...but blog content might be at an all time low this year. Not because lack of desire, oh no! More like all my creative energy is spent on things that hardly show it....looking at you school.

We're reading an epic poem this year that is really intense. There are 2 types of intense, one is everything you generally categorize under intense AND THEN there's epic poem intense.

I'll tell you, you don't ever want to be on the bad side of an epic poem. You might not survive.

So! In a lull of history and literature I decided to take those cheesy pictures you take when you first get a camera. Silly as they are, I hadn't indulged in the mindless pleasure in what, a week! Mirror selfies, check! Artfully arranged photos? Check. Lipstick mug shots? HECK YEAH.

Read on for some of my early Fall favorites.

▲▲ That's one thing I miss about summer - for fun reading! I used to read every night, and granted they were fluffy books, but still! This pride and prejudice is perfect for many reasons, one being the cute cover. The second being that the book is actually as good as the cover. Bonus!

▲▲ the best thing about teen pact is the amount of southern charm. I'm talking door holding ,pearls and monograms galore. it's really magical! I ended up wearing my friend Brianna pearls everyday at congress, and decided that a strand of pearls of my own was my next course of action. Lo and behold, my mom had some pearls from my grandmother that were literally PERFECT. And of course, now I've been wearing these everyday since.

Even to a volleyball game,
that I was playing in.

Let that one sink in.

▲▲ I'm not one to babble about makeup for hours, because as much as I'd like to think I know a thing or two about makeup, once I open my mouth it's pretty clear that a 12 year old could out do and out talk me. But trust me, these babies are good.

NYX LIP BUTTER
MAYBELLINE BABY SKIN PRIMER

▲▲ One night we went to a reaaaallly boring movie and then spent 3 hours (and $30 dollars) in the photobooth. It was literally one of the greatest nights of the summer. I'm so thankful for those two, and I miss my Lisa boo!

And there we have it! What have you been loving? TELL ME.

A WORLD OF OCTOBERS

not to be pinteresty but....

I LOVE OCTOBER BECAUSE......

FALL BREAK (a chance to reconnect with my first love Pinterest.)

CHOCOLATE (from trader joes...cheating on my first love just a bit.)

GOOD MUSIC (meghan trainor over taylor swift ANY day.)

GLASSES (pair #1: nerd. pair#2: nerd from 1970.)

A SKIRT THAT FITS JUST RIGHT (and it comes in pink too! hallelujah!)

EVEN WINGS (of eyeliner)

CRESCENT MOON MANI (because I finally have some time.)

THE PROMISE OF A COMING PUMPKIN PATCH....

what's been good about your fall, y'all?!

TAKING TEAM PHOTOS, BRB.

As fate would have it, this year I am dubbed photographer for all 3 volleyball teams...(even the one I'm on! Guess I'll get a selfie for my individual photo as you would expect no less from me!) anyway. I mean, I like taking photos! A lot! But this is like a terrifying honor because they actually can't be blurry. Or uber artsy. Or over exposed. Or grainy.

Think of all the beaming grandparents I would disappoint if they were!

Forget frameable or award winning, My goal for these photos are grandparents-wallet-worthy. That's the real prize in photo life, My friends.

DARK AND MOODY MONDAY

For the first time in probably 3 seasons I decided to skip a volleyball practice. And by skip I mean, I had a fever and I didn't feel like downing a bottle of dayquill. Instead the puppies and I went out side (something we used to do quite often) and I blessed the neighbors with music - both of my shutter clicking and my ukulele plucking.

I wasn't planning on going all black and white and moody with these photos but then again , Matthew Crawley just DIED. He's DEAD.

On second thought, black and white forever.

PS: Alternate ending; "Help I've fallen into Downton Abbey and I can't get up." Either works.
PPS: This song only increases the mood.
PPSS: Let's buy mood rings while we're at it! Though everyone I've ever had seems to get stuck on romantic...I can't imagine why!

Hola to you, October!

Cue everything pumpkin spice, because it's October kids!

(but if you're on instagram, you already knew all this.)

Anyway, I've had a mild case of Downton Abbey obsession, which naturally comes with a side effect of tea cravings. I mean, I've only watched like 6 episodes today. Like I said, a mild case. Nothing major.

But anyway! It's October (like we've previously stated) and with that comes all the pumpkin fall craze....for everyone but us because Florida isn't very good about being seasonally appropriate. Once again we didn't get the cooler weather memo or the falling leaves. But then again, it's not like I really have time for anything.....

Except for Downton Abbey, of course.

OCTOBER GOALS:

Post on social media once a week

Blog weekly

Make pumpkin stuff!

Fall shoot with Sarah

Work on Christmas boxes

Get back to bible studying

Enjoy the end of volleyball

get my permit (ha. that's a joke.)

COLOR MY HAIR, GO KRYN.

What goals are you planning up? Bathing in Pumpkin Spice Lattes? I wouldn't blame you!

XOXO,
PS EVERYTHING