Observations at the dentist office

Today I had to go to the dentist. Not exactly the most exciting way to spend your Monday, but It had to be done. And honestly (Oh man, am I celebrating or what?) I don't like dentists, offices or anything that goes on inside there. There's way to much pain and not enough fun. And stuffy assistants? No Thanks.

First of all, there's the issue of personal space. Dentist have a way of getting in your personal space bubble. They lay machines on your chest and stick hands in your mouth and basically ruin the experience that was never meant to be enjoyed. They tilt you back so far you are positive your are going to fall into a big head over heels heap at their feet. Then they stick a light an inch from your face and talk.....like it's no biggie.

Then, the gloves. Have you noticed how smelly those are? They smell badly of plastic latex with a little powder-ish stuff mixed in. And then they go about 1 inch from your nose. And with nothing to do other than count sheep or look up your dentists nose, you have to resign to the gloves. The stinky gloves. I once went to a dentist who had scented gloves. OH MY. They were amazing. They were grapey and goodey and smelled just like kids medicine. (By the way, that's a good thing.)

And finally (although I could go on) speaking to your hygienist. I never understand which degree of conversation I should go for. Are we swapping stories like lifelong friends, or should we be exchanging civil pleasantries like newly introduced people? Should we be talking about the weather, my schooling habits, your kids who's pictures are plastered all over? People who fluently speak hygienist amaze me. I kind of wish I could learn that language, but on the other hand, I don't go to the dentist enough to put it to good use. I should just learn French. That's way more practical.

Thank you for listening. Thank you for understanding my pain. Thank you for going through this with me.

Getting your teeth cleaned can be a very hard thing to go through alone. I'm so glad you are here.

Sincerely,
And I came home and read about barbies....